An article on how to not lead an awfulizing life and never feel awful when you can have a wonderful one and feel awesome.
Do you get annoyed pretty easily or does it need some effort on the part of the person wanting to do so? We are so busy in our lives, we are bound to meet some annoying people, episodes and weird stuff all ready to blow you out in a bubble, harass you, disappoint you or create a negative impact on your personality, mood and all things important for your proper self. Can we somehow find fixes and solutions in seconds to handle, manage and balance the haywire moments? If we want to keep that status of ‘feel-good-do-good’ idea very permanently with us, we have to first and foremost find a way not to get annoyed and smile to shine. Our aura and positive vibes are controlled to a large extent by stopping the urge to react by annoying ourselves and to keep feeling good. There may come, served in a platter, many awkward situations like the job not being completed on time, the clock being dead the 20th time, crying and wailing babies, weather cheating on you, the film shots not perfecting even for the 50th time, food going bad or your mobile discharging on way to your destination which will annoy you making you do mindless and crazy things. We know that we cannot afford being annoyed and that it’s gonna cost us more than we have, but still, we don’t show our thoughtfulness and ditch out. We need to think, analyze, reflect back and then decide on the most suitable option choice we have which definitely is, to be balanced. If you need to worry about your wellbeing you need to stop focussing on others, their behaviors and words and concentrate on finding our inner calm and sensible reasoning. It’s important that we don’t catastrophize the situation, i.e., believe that a situation is worse than its actuality. We many times become so horrified that we hallucinate our positions and feel the problem to be fully blown and out of control which is not completely right. We can reprogram our senses to say ‘no’ to things that try to annoy us and ‘yes’ to things that do the opposite. If one gets truly annoyed, one don’t let this feel smother and suffocate you, instead take a mindful pause, inhale and take deep breaths. Try to search for ways to get out of the negative downward spiral. Try to develop a simple rationale and clear mindset which itself is a solution to many visible and unforeseen problems dancing around you. By practicing these methods we will start to feel lighter, happier and better. According to the latest research most of the people are universally annoyed by some of these activities like canceled flights, irritable salesperson, leaking filters, unsatisfactory grades of kids, fingernails scratching on a blackboard. Social scientists Joe Palca and Flora Litchman’s book, Annoying: The science of what bugs us, is about why many times, very often typically largely unimportant, trivial matters drive us wild and crazy. They also discovered that being annoyed is the most widely experienced and least studied of all emotions. Annoyances are new social allergens, social acts that turn people off. These are acts that the other person may not do intentionally but these which we mistakenly take personally. Even people, adorable and dear to you like your parents, best friends, partners will wear on your nerves. One needs to follow a golden rule, ‘what annoys you, controls you’. We need to ask ourselves, can I control what’s bothering me’. Some situations are unmountable and unchangeable but we can control our reaction to them. We must use that power and choose to do something better and more useful. And there’s even a team that describes obsessing about annoyances, called ‘awfulizing’. It is the act of escalating a situation into the most negative possible conclusion. These ‘awfulizing’ situations can lead to lower productivity, limited creativity, more overall stress and anxiety at the workplace. We need to not personalize it. Don’t personalize annoying situations. The arrow is not necessarily always pointed at you. Don’t let it enter your energy systems and corrupt it too well. Cultivate patience, analysis, power, logic and an inner calm atmosphere. Rewire your brain to diffuse that ‘awfulizing’ bomb from tearing everything about you into minute bits and pieces. Cope with bad circumstances in other ways, smarter ones and get so perfected in your practice that you can set an example in never letting annoyance to control you. You control it and you throw it away, far away from yourself. We can avoid the annoyances by—
1. Journalising is a scientifically proven method to help calm you down by moving all those burning, churning, thoughts out of your head as you write them down.
2. Annoying situations and people are inevitable you cannot escape them, but train your mind to respond in a better, logical and smarter way.
3. Stop spiraling. When someone is really getting under your skin we show the tendency to think extensively for the reason of this happening as such.